"What do you fear?"

When I first started collecting written fears, that's the question I asked. The answers were usually broad and sometimes even funny. I fear failure. I fear spiders. I fear death. I fear judgment.

I've seen the same thing when I've asked professionals and leaders. The problem with these answers (whether they're from kids or CEOs) is that they're real but not very useful. You can't do much with "I fear failure." It keeps people circling the feeling without ever getting to action. That's when I realized the real issue wasn't the fear itself, it was the question we were asking.

The Evolution of Better Questions

So I refined it. I started asking, "What fear is preventing you from being your best? What fear is preventing you from accomplishing the things you want to achieve?"

The answers got a little clearer, but they still sat at a high level. People listed fears that were outside of their control, or so general that it was hard to do anything with them.

That's when it hit me. Most of the time, when people stay stuck in fear, it's not because they don't know what they're afraid of. It's because they aren't asking the right question.

The real breakthrough came with what I now call the Million-Dollar Question:

What FEAR is stopping me from taking what ACTION, preventing me from achieving what OUTCOME?

When Everything Shifts

When you frame fear this way, everything shifts. Suddenly, "I'm afraid of failure" becomes "I'm afraid to pitch this idea to leadership because I don't want to look unprepared, which is stopping me from advancing my career."

Or "I'm worried about the political climate" becomes "I'm afraid to make any big strategic moves because of economic uncertainty, which is preventing me from positioning my team for growth opportunities." That's something you can work with.

Breaking Out of the Fear Loop

Here's why this matters. When fears are vague, they keep us spinning in what I call the Fear Loop. You know that spinning circle on your computer when it's stuck processing? That's what happens in our minds. We're paralyzed, stagnating, feeling like there's no way out because we have these feelings in our heads but we don't know how to express or move past them. It's a constant loop with no clear next step.

You can't resolve a broad fear. But once you tie fear to a specific action and a specific outcome, it becomes manageable.

At that point, you can make choices. You can ask, "Is this a real risk I need to prepare for? Or is this just a worry outside of my control?" And if it's an action you can take, you know exactly what to do next.

The Million-Dollar Question turns fear from an abstract weight into something concrete. It gives you clarity, and clarity gives you momentum.

Your Challenge

The next time you feel fear or uncertainty creeping in, don't just ask yourself what you're afraid of. Ask yourself the

‍Million-Dollar Question:

What fear is stopping me from taking what action, preventing me from achieving what outcome?

Your answer might surprise you. More importantly, it might give you the clarity you need to finally take that next step forward.

‍