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Clap once if you're still awake.

Clap twice if you've ever felt fear, worry, or uncertainty.

Now clap three times if you've ever felt fear, worry, or uncertainty... and kept it in your head instead of saying it out loud.

By the time we get to the third clap in my keynote, almost every hand in the room is in motion. Because that's the truth about fear: most of us keep it bottled up, circling in our heads, never letting it out.That circling is what I call the Fear Loop.

What Happens When We're Stuck

When we're stuck in the Fear Loop, we replay the same feelings again and again. For me, it often shows up as dread.

I'll be honest. When I agree to speak in front of a group I'm less familiar with, or when I sit down to create new content, or even when I have a tough conversation ahead of me, my natural lean is dread. I dread it all the way up until the moment it happens. Not because I'm unprepared, but because I'm nervous. It's new. It's different. Then, almost every time, it works out. And if it doesn't work out perfectly, I still learn and grow. But that doesn't stop me from dreading it in advance.

That's the thing about the Fear Loop. Everyone leans on one of these feelings the most:

• Anxious
• Distrust
• Overwhelm
• Helpless
• Dread
• Panic

When fear shows up, we default to the one that feels most natural. And once it starts running circles in our head, it's hard to get out.

But here's what usually happens: we feel those emotions and never take the time to pause and actually consider what we're feeling. We just sit in it. And not only do we sit in it, but then we start piling on other fears, only making the problem worse. Let's say you really fear a presentation. You lean on one of the Fear Loop feelings, and because you never process it, something else happens later and you lean on another one. It's a constant building process, like pressure building toward an explosion.

Keeping fear in your head doesn't make it lighter. It makes it heavier. You start overthinking, spiraling, and losing momentum.

How to Break Out of the Fear Loop

The key to breaking the Fear Loop is what I call TRACE, the first step in building Fear Intelligence™. TRACE is about naming the fear and getting it out of your head so you can start to see it clearly.

That might mean:

• Writing it down in a notebook
• Saying it out loud to a friend, coach, or colleague
• Recording a quick voice memo

There's a mountain of research showing that externalizing fear (putting words to it in some way) reduces its hold.

A Simple Practice

Here's an easy way to try it. The next time you feel yourself circling in the Fear Loop, complete this sentence:

"I'm feeling ________ because I'm afraid ________."

For example: "I'm feeling panic because I'm afraid this presentation will expose that I don't know enough."

It sounds simple, but it works. Suddenly what felt like a fog becomes something you can actually work with.

The truth is, fear isn't the problem. Staying stuck in the Fear Loop is.

Once you name it, you begin the process of releasing it. You don't just release it instantly, but you start to see it clearly.

Your Challenge This Week

So here's my challenge. This week, catch yourself in the Fear Loop. Notice whether you're feeling anxious, distrust, overwhelm, helpless, dread, or panic. Remember there are many different feelings in the Fear Loop:

• Anxious
• Distrust
• Overwhelm
• Helpless
• Dread
• Panic

Then break the loop by tracing it, writing it, or saying it out loud.

Once fear is out of your head, it loses power. And that's when you finally get to take the next step forward.