The Fearless Five
The Fearless Five are five questions you can ask yourself when fear shows up. In this clip Darryl walks through the first two.
Question one is "What exactly am I afraid of?" Question two is "If it happens, what will I do next?" Along the way he shares a Cornell University study on worry and what it found about how few of our worries actually come true.
A good clip for a staff meeting or a planning team that wants something they can use on Monday.
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0:00 So now I want to introduce you all to five questions called the Fearless Five that you can ask yourself when you are processing those fears, to better embrace those fears that show up in our lives.
0:10 The first question is this: What exactly am I afraid of? Sometimes people say, think about the worst thing that can happen. I don't want you to think about the worst that could happen, because a lot of times it's not even the worst thing that's stopping us. A great tip is, when you figure out what that thing is, ask yourself why five times to get to what the real thing is.
0:34 How many worriers in the room, people who are always thinking about the worst that can happen? There was a study done at Cornell University where they asked people to write down all the things they were worried about for seven days. They actually texted them two times a day to make sure they did it. Then for the next 30 days, they had them check off all of the things that actually came true. It turned out that 15% of the things they wrote down actually came true. Some of y'all are like, that's why I don't try things. I'm going to get back to that in a moment.
1:09 Second question: If it happens, what will I do next? Why do we have plans for fire drills and hurricanes, but not for the things that we fear? If those things happen, what will I do next? What are those next steps? When we actually think about those things, we find we can handle most of what would happen.
1:31 So I told you all that 15% of the things they worried about actually happened. Guess what? They went back to those people and asked how many of that 15% they learned or grew from. It turned out that 79% of those things either turned out better than expected or they learned from it. When you do some quick math, that's 97%. 97% of the things we worry about never actually happen the way we fear.
1:53 So what are you worried about right now that might be in your mind in some way? It's not about being fearless, but fearing a little less.
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